War of Wits: The Sale
Open on a modern day parking lot. Captain James Cutter, in UNSC naval dress, is standing by a used car at a car dealership. The salesman is the Jiralhanae Atriox, wearing a tie and carrying a clipboard.
- Atriox: This may be yours for 6K. Do we have a deal?
- Cutter: Three.
- Atriox: Six!
- Cutter: I will get this car for 3K, and this is how...
Quick fade, then cut to the two at the car. Cutter starts to turn to leave.
- Cutter: (voiceover) I'll open with a strategic withdrawal.
- Atriox: Wait. Whoa, wait, hold on.
- Cutter: (voiceover) You counter with a disinformation campaign.
- Atriox: I'll talk to my manager and see what I can do.
Cut to inside Atriox's office. Nobody is inside but him. The wall is decorated with sales plaques and a dartboard picturing the Prophet of Regret.
- Atriox: Just a little longer...
Cut to Atriox's POV, as he watches Cutter on his security screen. Cut back to Atriox.
- Atriox: I'm talking to no one.
Cut back to outside. Atriox is back by the car with Cutter.
- Atriox: Great news. He said we could do 599...9.
- Cutter: (voiceover) Then, I'll bait you with psychological warfare.
- Cutter: Lemme talk to him. (gestures at an inflatable airdancer.) He seems more flexible.
- Atriox: A pun?! You know I hate puns! You catty little two-faced double opposable thumbed...
Cutter pulls out his phone and begins recording Atriox while the Brute continues to rant.
- Cutter: (voiceover) You will attempt a verbal assault.
- Atriox: I will tear your head off!
Cutter, still recording, turns to show himself in front of Atriox.
- Atriox: -and hang it from the rearview like a f-!
Atriox abruptly stops as he turns to see a man and young woman overhearing him. The father pulls his daughter away from the yelling Brute.
- Cutter: (voiceover) ...with collateral damage.
- Atriox: Oh no... sorry. Came out wrong.
- Cutter: (voiceover) The evidence of which will not look good in my online review. And that's how I'll get this car for 3K.
Fade cut back to the present, which Cutter having executed his plan. Atriox hangs his head in defeat.
- Atriox: Well played. How about a w-
Cutter, in the driver's seat of the car, hands Atriox's clipboard back to him.
- Cutter: Warranties are for suckers.
Cutter tosses the pen behind him and starts to drive away.
- Atriox: (speaking rapidly) All-sales-final-no-takebacks-no-substitutions-no-trades.
The car's rear bumper falls off. Cutter stops as the engine begins to smoke. Atriox laughs to himself.
KNOW YOUR ENEMY
HALO WARS 2
AVAILABLE FEBRUARY 21