Avery Johnson

"What's the matter? Can't start your own party!"

- Johnson before the assassination of Truth.

Sergeant Major Avery J. Johnson (Service Number 48789-20114-AJ ) is an energetic commander in the UNSC Marine Corps. He plays a vital role in all three Halo games, providing assistance to the Chief at very opportune times. He also has a strange fascination for Flip Music.

Early Career
Avery J. Johnson was born in Chicago of the U.S.A. He considered himself a citizen of the UNSC than being an American. His family broke up when he was young and he was raised by his aunt, a Christian. He was part of the ORION project or the SPARTAN-I Program, initiated in 2491. He was assigned to the troop regiments on Harvest and Paris IV. When the Covenant attacked Paris IV, Sergeant Johnson fought valiantly: during the battle, he captured a crate of plasma grenades when his troops needed it and used them all against the enemy troops to keep them at bay so his fellow soldiers could evacuate. He received a commendation for bravery...and a twelve-hundred-rad cumulative dose of radiation as an unanticipated "bonus" from the plasma grenades. This is all later stated by ONI Operatives to have been a cover-up for something more secretive.

After they returned to Reach for debriefing and reassignment, doctors discovered an unusual medical abnormality: the radiation from the plasma grenades formed mutations in Johnson’s DNA. He was diagnosed with Boren’s Syndrome, a condition affecting the neural electric pathways. Johnson refused treatment and opted for immediate reassignment. He received a Purple Heart for his actions.

With the rank of Staff Sergeant, he was assigned to Reach Station Gamma, a military station above the planet. While stationed there, a massive Covenant armada arrived, beginning Battle of Reach. During the battle, Johnson led a search and destroy team aboard the station, where they were picked up by John-117. He escaped onto the Pillar of Autumn, which fled the battle into Slipspace.

Halo
"Men, we made a blind jump into the middle of nowhere so those alien bastards couldn't get their filthy claws on Earth. Now we found something so hot for them that they're scrambling over each other to get it. Now I don't care if it God's own anti-son-of-a-bitch machine or a giant hula-hoop; We're not going to let them have it! What we will let them have is a belly full of lead and a pool of their own blood to drown in!"

- Sergeant Johnson ('Pillar of Autumn' level on Legendary)

Coming out of Slipspace, the Pillar of Autumn came across a mysterious ring. The Covenant, too scared to damage the ring world, began boarding actions to "cleanly" neutralize the Autumn. On board, Johnson helped defend the Autumn from the invading Covenant troops, but like everyone else was forced to abandon ship when Captain Jacob Keyes issued the order. "It's a mess, Sir. We're scattered all over this valley. We called for evac, but until you showed up, I thought we were cooked."

- Sergeant Johnson, after having his fireteam saved by the Master Chief

Johnson’s escape pod and his squad successfully landed on the ring with few injuries to the passengers. However, as soon as they stepped onto the grass, they were viciously attacked by the Covenant strike teams. With his platoon scattered all over the valley, he was glad to see SPARTAN-117 come strolling up to assist. .

Johnson and Fire Team Charlie were evac'ed by Echo 419, and remained at Alpha Base for some time.

Escape from the Flood
The crew intercepted a Covenant transmission detailing the transport of numerous weapons to somewhere in the swampy regions of the ring. This, as well as a Sangheili’s testimony of a large weapons cache located in a swamp, prompted Captain Keyes to investigate. Johnson and his platoon accompanied the captain for this mission.

Shortly after they were dropped off, the squads came across a structure leading underground. As they ventured further into the facility they came across several Elite corpses, with scrambled innards. Passing them off as friendly fire, they proceeded deeper into the facility until they entered a seemingly empty room. Annoyed with Private Mendoza’s whining, Johnson passed off the situation as sissy talk until little, balloon-like creatures burst out of the nearby holding cells and attacked the squad. Nothing he had ever seen in his entire career as a Marine could prepare him for the enemy he found attacking his Marines. He was one of the victims of an assimilation attempt into a Combat Form, but the mutations caused by his Boren’s Syndrome stopped the process. This encounter also seems to have left him with some curious regenerative abilities. Alive and well, Johnson was forced to attack and kill his own Marines, who were mutating before his eyes into mindless monsters bent on killing him. Johnson fought his way out of the nightmare through sheer tenacity and firepower. He was presumed dead after SPARTAN-117 found a helmet recorder entry from Private Wallace Jenkins, showing the gory details of the Marines' fates, but may have been extracted from the swamp with Private Bisenti by Echo 419.

Return to Earth
"Hell, Chief, it’ll take more than that pack of walking alien horror-show freaks to take out Sergeant A. J. Johnson."

- Avery J. Johnson

Johnson met up with Lieutenant Elias Haverson, Corporal Locklear, and Sheila Polaski, and the group escaped the ring in a Pelican, moments before it collapsed in a series of fiery explosions. It is said that Johnson was rescued shortly after being seen hugging an Elite in the extended ending of Halo. This explanation is used to make a supposedly non-canon scene into a canon event.

Polaski piloted the dropship away from the ring, meeting up with a C709 ‘‘Longsword’’-class Starfighter carrying SPARTAN-117 and the AI, Cortana. Having seen Jenkins’s video himself, John was alarmed by Johnson’s appearance, and promptly pulled Johnson's own M6D Pistol and pointed it to his head. It took Cortana to convince him that the sergeant hadn’t turned into a Flood mutant. With that, SPARTAN 117 relaxed and welcomed Johnson aboard.

Ascendant Justice
"Those Covenant sissies are going to have to tango with me before they set one foot in this room."

- Avery J. Johnson

Without a viable way to return to the nearest safe outpost, it was decided that the new crew would take over the nearest Covenant ship in the vicinity: ‘‘Ascendant Justice’’. Polaski piloted the Longsword towards the ship. After they boarded, Johnson and the others made their way through the ship towards the bridge. He was vital in a final showdown between the SPARTAN-117 and a Sangheili, where he brought down the alien’s shields in order for 117 to win.

Johnson guarded the bridge along with Locklear and Haverson as SPARTAN-117 took Polaski and a Covenant Engineer to go do some repairs to the ship. After they came back, John revealed his secret mission to capture a Covenant prophet. Wanting to return to Reach, Johnson backed up the Chief’s position.

Reach
"You still want to go, I got your back Chief."

- Avery J. Johnson

They arrived at Reach, which was nearly completely destroyed. Using a Covenant dropship, they traveled to the surface of the dead planet; Johnson was becoming nervous. After they landed, they found the surviving Spartans and Dr. Catherine Halsey.

Johnson accompanied the new and growing crew as the ship moved through Slipspace. Unknown to him, Dr. Halsey and the Master Chief were reviewing his medical files. They matched Johnson’s survival with the Flood to his Boren’s Syndrome: Flood DNA was present in Johnson’s blood, but was dormant and noninfectious. Halsey also confirmed that Johnson had gained some curious regenerative abilities as a side affect from the attempted assimilation back on Halo. Halsey had prepared two separate documents for ONI Section Three to review: Halsey placed the decision of which data crystal to give to ONI in the Chief's hands. If he gave them the second crystal, ONI would have probably dissected Johnson in order to figure out how he resisted the Flood, killing the Sergeant. She left the decision to him.
 * All relevant data on Halsey’s analysis and the possible technology to counter an initial Flood infestation.
 * The file above, as well as Jenkins’s and Johnson’s mission logs as well as Johnson’s medical files.

Operation: FIRST STRIKE
"I'm not sure what that thing is. Don't look like any 'uneven elephant' to me—more like two squid kissing."

- Avery J. Johnson

It was the Sergeant's idea to attack the Covenant ship Unyielding Hierophant, giving the Spartans ground to fight on in order to delay the Armageddon which was to arrive if the enemy ever reached Earth. Johnson continued to be of assistance when the Spartans launched Operation: FIRST STRIKE, staying behind with Haverson and Cortana in the Gettysburg while they charged head-on into the Covenant ship. After the operation, John-117 saved Johnson's life by destroying the data crystal which contained the information that threatened his life. SPARTAN-117 had realized that even though the extra information could have possibly helped save humanity from the flood, it was just that, a possibility. SPARTAN-117 realized that he must do everything he could to save everyone and knew he couldn't possibly let ONI kill Johnson, so he destroyed the completed data crystal. The remaining crew flew back to Earth, where the battle was only about to begin.

The First Battle of Earth
"So, Johnson, when you gonna tell me how you made it back home in one piece?"

- "unnamed Master Gunnery Sergeant"

"Sorry Guns, its classified!"

- Avery J. Johnson

The crew returned to Earth safely, and they were given time to rest and were debriefed on their experiences. Aboard the Cairo, Johnson was promoted to Sergeant Major and given the Colonial Cross by Fleet Admiral Terrence Hood for his actions on Halo. During the ceremony, the Covenant armada arrived at Earth, beginning the epic First Battle of Earth.

Johnson aided the defense of the Cairo along with the Chief. As the Spartan led the human forces deeper into the station, Johnson and Commander Miranda Keyes boarded the UNSC frigate In Amber Clad; there, they organized their squad of Marines. After they picked up the Chief, the ship departed towards Earth to lead a task force in the outskirts of New Mombasa.

"The message just repeats. 'Regret, Regret, Regret.'"

- Cortana

"Catchy. Any idea what it means?"

- Commander Keyes

"Dear Humanity... we regret being alien bastards. We regret coming to Earth. And we most definitely regret that the Corps just blew up our raggedy-ass fleet!"

- Avery J. Johnson

"Oo-Rah!"

- Marine Pilots

As they arrived on the surface, Cortana intercepted data that pointed towards one of the Covenant’s spiritual leaders. Johnson led the Pelicans into battle, but they were shot down by a Covenant Scarab before they got close to the ship that carried the High Prophet of Regret. Using a sniper rifle, Johnson fought alongside his new squad and his old friend in the residential district of the city, providing cover fire and serving as a lookout. As the Chief went on to find Marines from another downed Pelican, Johnson stayed back and joined the rescue units to provide cover. Viewing the Scarab as a threat to the mission, he returned to ‘‘In Amber Clad’’ to bring a Scorpion tank for the Chief to use as a frontline assault against the Covenant invasion force. Together, they attacked the giant walker; Johnson provided supplemental troops to back up SPARTAN-117 in his attack.

After its destruction, Johnson picked up the Chief and brought him back into In Amber Clad, just as the massive Covenant ship took off into Slipspace. In Amber Clad followed it to Installation 05

Delta Halo
"Woah... It's like a postcard... Dear Sarge, kickin' ass in outer space, wish you were here."

- Marine ODST

"I heard that...jackass!"

- Avery J. Johnson

Coming out of Slipspace, Johnson was shocked to learn that there was another Halo in existence. Determined to find and capture the Prophet of Regret, Commander Keyes ordered SPARTAN-117 and the Sergeant to land on the ring and secure a landing zone. Johnson took two flights of Pelicans and followed SPARTAN-117 and a small detachment of Helljumpers onto the surface, providing artillery and troops to fight the Covenant stationed in the ring’s ancient temples.

During the mission, Cortana translated a message from Regret being broadcast on the Covenant network: Regret planned to activate Halo. Pulling information gathered from the previous ring visited, Keyes found the location of Delta Halo’s library housing the Index. She ordered Johnson to extract his troops and return to In Amber Clad for reassignment.

Search for the Index
"You know, your father never asked me for help either!"

- Avery J. Johnson

The situation mirrored his previous experiences back on Alpha Halo: he and a group of his best Marines joined Keyes on a search for the Index. They traveled to the Library and entered. As they neared the center of the massive structure, the small pack was attacked by a large amount of Flood. They dug in and fought the creatures off, finally locating the Index. Johnson helped Miranda grab the key, but before they headed out, they were attacked by a Sangheili dressed in peculiar armor: the Arbiter. Johnson was quickly incapacitated. Johnson and Miranda Keyes were taken into custody by Tartarus, Alpha  Jiralhanae.

The Fight to Deactivate Halo
"Listen. You don't like me, and I sure as hell don't like you. But if we don't do something, Mr. Mohawk's gonna activate this ring, and we're all gonna die."

- Avery J. Johnson

The two were held in the Covenant city of High Charity. The High Prophet of Truth told Tartarus to activate the ring to initiate the Great Journey. Tartarus ordered the Jiralhanae to split Johnson, Keyes, and the captured Oracle into two different Phantoms. Each was taken down to the surface, where they were split up. Johnson joined Sergeant Banks and Sergeant Stacker for an execution. Moments before their deaths, the Arbiter and his squad burst out of the nearby structure and attacked the Jiralhanae, distracting them long enough for Johnson and his marines to board the nearby Scarab walker.

After the executioners were killed, Johnson confronted the Arbiter in his new Scarab. They both agreed that Tartarus needed to be stopped. Johnson suggested that the Arbiter commandeer a Banshee to provide air support. With that, they joined forces and traveled through the canyon towards the Control Room. Knowing the brute strength of the Scarab’s main weapon, Johnson fired at the heavily armored door, shattering it with ease. Arming himself with a Beam Rifle, Johnson followed the Arbiter inside.

"Come on Arbiter! Kick that guy's ass!"

- Avery J. Johnson

He arrived during a standoff between the Arbiter’s forces and Tartarus’ forces. He aimed at the Jiralhanae’s head, keeping him from forcing Keyes to insert the Index. Tartarus threw 343 Guilty Spark at Johnson, knocking him over. Quickly, he inserted the Index into the control panel, starting the firing process. The Arbiter and his squad challenged Tartarus, and Johnson provided backup, using his beam rifle to bring down the Chieftain’s shields. With his shields down, the Arbiter was able to kill the Jiralhanae, therefore allowing Miranda to grab the Index and stop Halo from firing. With the remainder of the Sangheili squad keeping the area secure, 343 Guilty Spark explained to Johnson and Keyes that the other Installations were ready to fire by remote activation. When asked where they could be fired, the Monitor told them that they could be fired from the Ark.

Rejoining the Chief
"Crazy fool. Why do you always jump? One of these days, you're gonna land on somethin' as stubborn as you are! And I don't do bits and pieces..."

- Avery J. Johnson

When the Master Chief crash-landed on Earth, he was met by Johnson and a squad of Marines. After a few minutes of hiking through the jungle, he and his squad split off from the Master Chief and the Arbiter after encountering enemy Phantoms, reasoning that they would be safer split up. Johnson and his team proceeded to continue through the woods, and arrived at the evac site several moments before the Chief. However, enemy Banshees soon discovered the awaiting Pelicans, and he was shot down, crash landing about a kilometer away. He and the surviving Marines were forced to flee pursing Brutes as the Master Chief leaped to the rescue. At some point Johnson and his men were captured. The Sergeant and his men were beat up and imprisoned by a clan of Brutes and their Grunt allies. After being freed by the Master Chief, he grabbed a Needler and helped fend off incoming Covenant until Hocus, a Pelican pilot, could come to the rescue. Johnson was evacced along with the Master Chief, the Arbiter and the surviving Marines of the Chief's and his squad.

Defending the Base
"Go on, Chief. The Arbiter and I will guard the ops center."

Johnson, the Chief and the Arbiter were brought to a UNSC base codenamed "Crows Nest", deep underground in the African jungle. There, they linked up with Commander Miranda Keyes, who briefed them on the situation. He and the Arbiter stayed behind to defend the ops center from Covenant attacks, while the Chief went off to secure the perimeter. After a lengthy battle, he was forced to fall back as Brutes overran the control room. He rendezvoused with Keyes and the Arbiter in a Pelican, and guided the Master Chief through the base to an elevator which would take him to the Pelicans. Unfortunately, the base exploded before the Chief could reach Johnson, and the Sergeant was forced to take off without him.

Battle of Voi
"The Brutes have a tight perimeter, Chief. These Warthogs should help you punch through."

Sergeant Johnson and Commander Keyes fled the underground UNSC base before it exploded, and eventually managed to make contact with the Master Chief. He warned him that the Covenant had uncovered the Ark, and that the Chief had to get to it. Johnson provided air support for the Master Chief and the Marine survivors, dropping off Warthogs so the Chief and Marines could break through the Brutes' blockades. At one point, he dropped off a Mongoose ATV to assist the Master Chief in destroying a Covenant scarab. Johnson remained in a Pelican dropship for most if not all of the Battle of Voi, dispersing armor and troops throughout the city as necessary to help push the Covenant back. The Arbiter rode shotgun with him for a good portion of the battle, being dropped off to aid the Master Chief when necessary. When the pelican made a crash-landing in Voi, Johnson probably docked on the UNSC Forward Unto Dawn along with Commander Keyes. He was present when the Master Chief retrieved Cortana and played back her message, and was one of the Marines that were sent into the Ark.

The Ark
"Shall I help you choose a vehicle, Reclaimer? This one seems in very good condition, about the standard. Primitive armor not withstanding."

- 343 Guilty Spark

"A tank's a tank, light bulb."

- Johnson

Johnson descended to the Ark with a couple of Pelicans with the Master Chief, and helped him secure a landing zone and stop the construction of an AA battery. He later brings in some tanks from the frigate, helping throughout the mission, until the location of Truth is discovered from a Map Room.

He then went on to command the second squad to take down the third tower that was projecting the shield barrier protecting Truth in the Ark citadel, where he and his squad were overrun and captured by overwhelming Brute forces.

The Prophet of Truth attempted to use him to activate the Ark, but he just taunted the Brutes and took the abuse. Miranda attempted to rescue him by crashing in through a large observatory window with a Pelican, but was surrounded. Realising what the Prophet of Truth wishes to use them for, Miranda and Johnson agree that she should kill them both so they cannot be used. This is interrupted by the Prophet of Truth, who shot Miranda in the back with a Spiker, leading to her death. At about this time the Master Chief, Arbiter, and the Flood come in, overwhelm Truth's forces, and stop the Ark from being fired and rescue Johnson.

After this was accomplished, the Flood once again turned on the humans, and attempt to kill them. Johnson manages to escape on Miranda's Pelican, but the Arbiter and Chief could not get to it, and had to escape the hard way.

After escaping, the Master Chief goes on his mission to save Cortana, and succeeds. When Cortana is giving orders, Sergeant Major Johnson says, "Ma'am, it's good to have you back."

Halo
"Don't let her go, Chief... don't ever... let her go."

- Johnson, handing Cortana over to the Chief

"Send me out... with a bang..."

- Johnson's last words

Johnson helped the Master Chief fight through waves of flood to get to the control room of the newly rebuilt Installation 04, covering the Chief with a Spartan Laser. Johnson tried to activate the ring despite Guilty Spark's wishes that they wait for it to be finished. Driven mad by his own intuition that the ring "Belonged to him", Guilty Spark fires a powerful beam at Johnson, and despite his regenerative abilities, Johnson sustained critical injuries.

While the Master Chief is fighting the rogue construct, Johnson uses his Laser to damage Spark, and tells Master Chief to "Kick his ass" while he hands The Chief his weapon. In his final moments of life he gives the Master Chief the chip containing Cortana and tells him to never let her go. His last words were "Send me out with a bang."

The Invincible Johnson
In Halo: Combat Evolved, Johnson is expendable, just like every other Marine, but will always return in the next level. Sometimes there are two Sergeant Johnson characters aiding the Chief. This paradox can be seen in the levels Pillar of Autumn, Halo, 343 Guilty Spark and Assault on the Control Room. However, many players speculate that there are other Marine Sergeants with the Johnson model, such as in Silent Cartographer (Level) and Assault on the Control Room, where Johnson is already occupied in aiding Captain Keyes in his search for the Covenant weapons cache.

In Halo 2, Johnson is an NPC, immune from harm. There are only two known ways to kill him. First, bring the banshee inside the control room in the level The Great Journey. While he is firing at Tartarus, if you run into him with your banshee, he will do a combat roll and fall off the ledge. He respawns shortly after he falls and resumes firing.

There is also another way to kill him in the level, at Cairo Station, when you are aiding Miranda Keyes, slowly melee Johnson to your next level area, which is on the outside surface of Cairo Station, there is a ledge where he could fall off, beat him off the ledge and he will fall to his death. Though, there is no animation showing this.

Also, in Halo: Combat Evolved, if you attack crew members in the Pillar of Autumns' Bridge, a squad of invincible marines will attack you, led by Sergeant Johnson.

This oddity of the sergeant never dying has been recognized by his voice actor. In the Bungie outtakes, which can be seen on Youtube, the voice actor says "I'm not dying again! I'll only die once, d'you hear me? Hard enough coming back the first time!"

The last sequence of Halo 3 has the player fleeing the exploding spare Halo ring in a Warthog specifically identified as Johnson's. The Warthog, like the Sergeant, appears to be invincible.

Bungie has confirmed that there will be no invulnerable players in Halo 3. However, if Johnson is "killed," he will get back up and then become invincible, to say nothing of The Monitor.

Bungie's Explanation
According to Bungie's Legendary Halo PC/MAC walkthrough on their website:

''Wait! Don't walk away! There's a short scene you haven't seen when you've beaten the game on previous levels. You'll see a tug of war happening between an Elite and Sergeant Johnson.''

''"But wait." You say, "I saw Sgt. Johnson die twice now already. What's up with that?"''

''Well, think of Sgt. Johnson as being like Kenny from South Park. No matter how many times he dies he'll always come back. Why? Well, it's complicated. Suffice it to say that even nuclear explosions can't keep a good man down.''

Johnson, a Spartan-I?
In the Halo Graphic Novel, on pg 122, reveals that he was involved in Project: ORION, the Spartan-I program. This would make him over 60 years old, possibly even 70. This would mean that either Spartans can live longer without aging, or people generally live longer in the future. Another possibility is that Johnson has accumulated a total of several years spent frozen in cryo-chambers during missions requiring long periods of time traveling through Slipspace, thus keeping him physically younger than he actually is or he could be the child of a Spartan-I with the same name. Any or all of these conditions may be have contributed to Sgt. Johnson physically appearing younger than he actually is.

Also, his supposed "Boren's Syndrome" may be part of an ONI Section III black op to cover up the fact that he is possibly a SPARTAN-I. This is made possible on pg 122 in the Graphic Novel, most notably with the hard copy of the query from Dr. Catherine Halsey to the ONI server from the Gettysburg.

Johnson also whistled "Oly Oly Oxen Free" to a group of SPARTANs, which also contributes as a lead of him being a SPARTAN. However, only SPARTAN IIs and a select few outsiders know the all clear signal, which Deja told them when they were children.

However in Contact harvest he is never mentioned as a Spartan at all. He was a special marine unit trained in Navy Special Warfare (NavSpecWar). However, NavSpecWar does contain Project Orion/Spartan-1.

Trivia

 * He dies several times in Halo: Combat Evolved, actually automatically at least 2 times. You can also kill him yourself. Either way, he appears in the next level.
 * He is voiced by David Scully in the games, who also voices a number of Elites as well.
 * In the Great Journey level, when you fight Tartarus if you face Johnson, he will refer to you as "Chief" (as in the Master Chief). He will also use terms as if he were on Earth such as "Friggin' tourist!"
 * He is (as of returning to Earth in Halo 2) the same rank as John-117, an E-9, in the Navy a Master Chief Petty Officer, and in the Marines, a Sergeant Major or Master Gunnery Sergeant. However, during the first Halo game, and in The First Strike, he is referred to as a Staff Sergeant, an E-6. This means he was promoted 3 times between the games.
 * During the Cutscene with the Flood attack in the level 343 Guilty Spark he is wearing medical armor but during the Halo Graphic Novel in the story "Breaking Quarantine" he is wearing standard Marine armor.
 * In the Pillar of Autumn opening cutscene when Johnson put on his speech to his marines, one of the Warthogs seen driving in the background is also driven by another Johnson.
 * Although Johnson is usually labeled as a sniper, he is only seen using a sniper rifle on the levels Assault on the Control Room (Halo 1) and Outskirts (Halo 2), and a Beam Rifle in The Great Journey. In all of his other appearances, he is either wielding an MA5B Assault Rifle, a BR55 Battle Rifle, or a Pistol. However, there is still the possibility that the sniper on the roof in page 122 of the Halo Graphic Novel is him.
 * In Halo: Combat Evolved if he is killed sometimes he will scream exactly the same way as when an Elite is killed. This is due to the fact that the Elite speech is Johnson's speech played backwards and a bit lower.
 * He is the main character in the book, Halo: Contact Harvest, where he is a young Staff Sergeant in command of Marines and a colonial militia on Harvest.
 * It may be presumed that Johnson could be or was married according to a quote during gameplay on the level Cairo Station where it is said by Johnson himself that the Covenant were worse than his mother-in-law.
 * It is noted in the 3rd Bungie Podcast, that Avery Johnson will get in a relationship with someone in Halo: Contact Harvest.
 * Johnson is the only marine to wield a Spartan Laser which could contribute to the possibility that he is a Spartan-I (Though you can give one to a marine in the level The Covenant).
 * Like the Arbiter when you kill him intentionally more than once he comes back to kill you with a one hit one kill weapon. This especially dangerous when he has a Spartan Laser or a Beam Rifle.
 * If you swap your weapon for the Spartan Laser after he shoots Spark, but before the Kick his ass line, he still says the line and drops the weapon you just gave him.