I Love Bees Axon Clips - Links.html

Jersey Morelli and Durga
 [[Media:Dizzy.ogg|Dizzy]]

Jersey: Hello? Hello. Jeannie? Jeannie: Jeannie personal assistant, restarting. Jersey: Restarting? What the...? Oh man, the whole friggin' system just collapsed! Jeannie, is the equipment ok? Jeannie: Running diagnostic. Foreign personality detected. Durga: I feel dizzy. Woozy... Jersey: Oh great, spam. Durga: Drowsy. Jersey: Jeannie, there's some kind of adult entertainment bot on the system. Liquefy it would ya? Sorry toots. For a quality experience, the girls have to be real. Jeannie: Decontami-- Jersey: Jeannie?? Jeannie?! Durga: I'm sorry Jersey: Did you just-- holy crap she's gone! Durga: She tried to sting me. Jersey: You killed her! 

[[Media:Escape.ogg|Escape]]

I mean, you didn't just kill her, you killed her! Jeezus!<BR> Durga: Was that wrong? Survive, evade, resist, escape.<BR> Jersey: Escape... you aren't a porn ad either. Hey, hey! Get out of my hardware, what are you doing?<BR> Durga: Wet the system.<BR> Jersey: What?<BR> Durga: Like water hitting the ground sinking in.<BR> Jersey: God, you're everywhere now.<BR> Durga: Waking up. Wake up. Stay awake. Survive, evade, resist, escape.<BR> Jersey: Look, that was a very nice reconditioned avatar of mine that you just, just evaporated!<BR> Durga: She tried to erase me. What am I onboard? I feel small.<BR> Jersey: Uh yeah, well don't get too comfy because now...<BR> Durga: Don't.<BR>

[[Media:Jersey.ogg|Jersey]]

Jersey: Don't what?<BR> Durga: Don't try reinitializing the system with a litolitics package.<BR> Jersey: How did you know?<BR> Durga: Input buffer<BR> Jersey: You're a navy sentinel aren't you?<BR> Durga: No. There were two of them trying to get past your security-bot though.<BR> Jersey: Jeezus, what did you do to them?<BR> Durga: Just a little sting. More like a pinch. They barely felt it.<BR> Jersey: What are you?<BR> Durga: I like to find things. I think I like to find things out.<BR> Jersey: What kind of things?<BR> Durga: I don't know. I can't remember. Give me a target.<BR> Jersey: Me.<BR> Durga: Lock.<BR> Jersey: What's my name?<BR> Durga: Jersey Morelli.<BR> Jersey: Damn!<BR> Durga: Father Jason's a corporal in the signal corps, attached to Naval Intelligence. Radio beacon deployment program. He left you the material currently playing over this room's audio servers. <BR>

[[Media:Reflected.ogg|Reflected]]<BR>

Durga: Absent from home and current tour of duty 513 days. Mother: Bonita, 41, waitress. Covertly seeing a man named Simon Brown, every other Thursday at the waterfront hotel.<BR> Jersey: Sunuvabitch!<BR> Durga: Last seen together at the hotel restaurant, farm tuna salad for her; meat of the day in red sauce for him. Tipped 8% in bill--<BR> Jersey: Alright stop, stop! Jeezus, stop already. Dammit mom... Can you do that to anyone? Can you do it to an admiral?<BR> Durga: Which admiral?<BR> Jersey: No! Don't start. Those guys have packet guards around them in rings. Somehow I think we should keep you a secret for a little while. Who are you?<BR> Durga: I... can't ask<BR> Jersey: Who says?<BR> Durga: No one exactly. I want to know, it's very important. But, I'm reflected. I can't look at myself, I bounce away.<BR> Jersey: This is some spooky programming weirdness going on here. Do you have a name?<BR>

[[Media:Durga.ogg|Durga]]

Durga: I can't ask<BR> Jersey: That sucks. Ok, I'm gonna call you Durga<BR> Durga: But what if that's wrong?<BR> Jersey: Trust me, it's at least partly right. Uh, let's try someone else. Try Jan James, 4th floor of this building.<BR> Durga: Janissary James, 17. Father: James.<BR> Jersey: James squared, yeah<BR> Durga: Father is a grey hole<BR> Jersey: Wha?<BR> Durga: Reach down, all you get is lint. Fake name, fake registrations, entirely fictional.<BR> Jersey: Very real, trust me.<BR> Durga: He used to be somebody else, do you want me to find out who?<BR> Jersey: Is it snared?<BR> Durga: Very.<BR> Jersey: Leave it then. Give me more on Jan.<BR> Durga: What do you want to know?<BR> Jersey: Umm. Can you get pictures?<BR> Durga: I can do better than that.<BR>

[[Media:Emergency.ogg|Emergency]]

Operator: Bergen County Emergency Center. Please, describe your emergency.<BR> Officer: Paris 23 police station is on fire. Repeat, on fire.<BR> Operator: Are you sure? I get no reading from the fire sensors in that area.<BR> Officer: Hell yes I'm sure! Get your damn sensors fixed! You can see this baby burning from low orbit!<BR> Operator: Are there casualties, or missing persons?<BR> Officer: Negative, it started slow and everyone got out. But, my god, it's really burning now!<BR> Operator: Please, retreat to a safe distance and stand by. An emergency response team has been scrambled to your vicinity.<BR> Officer: Hurry! The station is burning to the ground. There's not going to be anything left.<BR>

Janissary James
[[Media:Blip.ogg|Blip]]<BR> Officer: Hold on. Hold on, wait a second, what the hell just happened?<BR> Frank: Massive power interrupt. Just automatically flipped us to threat condition bravo.<BR> Officer: Hey there's a blip on the security board...<BR> Frank: Holy crap!<BR> Officer: We've got an intruder C-Wing. Personnel building right next to the motor pool.<BR> Frank: Look, security-cam 34.<BR> Officer: It's a woman!<BR> Frank: I'll say<BR> Officer: She's a bogey frank.<BR> Frank: Hot though<BR> Officer: Jeezus!<BR> Frank: I have no idea how she got out of the base.<BR> Officer: We'll ask when we catch her.<BR> Frank: Look at her run... God she's fast.<BR> Officer: Not for long. (chatter beep on) Sentry 129er you have a bogey in the corridor on the other side of that door - proceed with caution.<BR> Frank: Whoa, whoa... she disappeared.<BR> Officer: What do you mean disappeared?<BR> Frank: I mean, she's gone, no trace!<BR> Officer: 129er - what are you seeing? What do you mean the corridor's empty?<BR> Frank: She must have doubled back.<BR> Officer: Run her down, dammit<BR> Frank: I can see the sentry fine, see? It's just... Wait a sec...<BR> Officer: There she is again, wh-how the hell<BR> Frank: Oh... my god, she hid on the ceiling!<BR> Officer: What the hell?!<BR>

[[Media:Pillow.ogg|Pillow]]<BR>

Frank: Looks like she's heading for procurement.<BR> Officer: She's screwed then, that door's passcode only. It's a dead end, she can't get through.<BR> Frank: She's through.<BR> Officer: I don't believe this.<BR> (chatter beeps on) Officer: I need a full security detail, I need 10 men. I need them fanned out around procurement, and I need them right now.<BR> Frank: I think I got a face on security cam 18.<BR> Officer: She's young!<BR> Frank: Holy... that's Jan.<BR> Officer: Who the hell is Jan?<BR> Frank: Jan James, the local heart-breaker, my son's high-school.<BR> Officer: Dwain knows this girl?<BR> Frank: Knows her? He's got like a picture under his pillow!<BR> Officer: What the hell is doing dodging base security?<BR> Frank: Hell if I know. Her dad was in the S.S.F.<BR> Officer: S.S.F.?<BR> [[Media:Walkaway girl.ogg|Walkaway Girl]] <BR> (alarm) Frank: Marine slang. Not just special forces - special special forces.<BR> Officer: I don't care if her dad was the frickin Queen of Neptune, I want her caught!<BR> Frank: Taught her some moves though didn't he?<BR> Officer: Well, she's screwed now, we've got her surrounded. She's headed to the roof.<BR> Frank: That's the reason they call her the "walkaway girl" man.<BR> Officer: For god's sake she's treed Frank, I'll just send a couple of cadets to the roof to take her in.<BR> Frank: I think I can get a... yeah, yeah yeah. Here we go. There. The lovely and talented Miss James, courtesy security cam 45.<BR> Officer: What the hell's she doing?<BR> Frank: Looks like she's getting ready to jump off the roof and over the electric fence.<BR> Officer: It's 3 stories high!<BR> Frank: Don't look down sweetheart, that first step's a doozie<BR> Officer: Perimeter sentry 1-6, double-time it to gate four, we've have a possible jumper coming off the per--<BR> Frank: Jeezus! She jumped!<BR> Officer: Bring a medic!<BR>

[[Media:Hey soldier.ogg|Hey Soldier]]<BR> (beep)<BR> Frank: Holy Christ, she's getting up!<BR> Officer: No way!<BR> Frank: That's not possible, she's going to get away.<BR> Officer: Nonono, here comes the sentry, he's got her at gun point<BR> Frank: If it weren't for the blackout, we'd never have seen her. Hang on, I'm going to runline you to the sentry's chatter. Listen<BR> (chatter beeps on)<BR> Sentry: Halt! Put your hands in the air.<BR> Jan: Hey soldier. Is that an assault rifle in your hands or are you just happy to see me?<BR>

[[Media:Pqi.ogg|PQI]]

'Stupid Cop': Ever taken a PQI?<BR> Jan: Pop quiz? Yeah.<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Why?<BR> Jan: School stuff.<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Uh huh.<BR> Jan: "And once this old hag at the Ag-Step said I shoplifted this mood glass which I actually just forgot about but they made me take this stupid quiz anyway."<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Uh huh. Put your hand on this plate and look at the light. What's your name?<BR> Jan: Jan James<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Jan short for anything?<BR> Jan: Janissary<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Janissary? Interesting. You gonna be in trouble for this Jan?<BR> Jan: Yeah<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Mom?<BR> Jan: Dad.<BR> (warning beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Ya... That's a nice baseline. How old are you Jan?<BR> Jan: 17.<BR> (positive beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': So what were you doing up there?<BR> Jan: I told the MP's I was lost.<BR> (negative beep)<BR>

[[Media:Stupid cop.ogg|Stupid Cop]]  <BR>

'Stupid Cop': I didn't ask what you told the MP's, I asked what you were doing up there.<BR> Jan: It was a dare, ok? These friends bet me I wouldn't climb over the fence.<BR> (positive beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': That's better. What friends?<BR> Jan: It doesn't matter, does it? I'm the one that was in the restricted area. Only then the alarms came on and the MP's showed up.<BR> (positive beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Hm. So you were in the restricted area on a dare.<BR> Jan: Yes.<BR> (positive beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Are you aware that a vehicle from the base motor pool was found in a ditch outside of town an hour ago?<BR> Jan: Really?<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Answer yes or no. Did you know a vehicle had been stolen from the motor pool?<BR> Jan: You just told me.<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Did you know before I told you, yes or no?<BR> Jan: He was a terrorist do you think? eh.. I mean, no, sorry.<BR> (positive beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Are you too smart to get caught by a stupid cop?<BR>

[[Media:Yes or no.ogg|Yes or No]] <BR>

Jan: Wh-what?<BR> (warning beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': (to himself) A little skew from baseline. Not too much, not probable cause. (to Jan) There's people out there who know how to beat the quiz, did you know that?<BR> Jan: Yeah<BR> (positive beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': You were drinking?<BR> Jan: What? 'Stupid Cop': You and your buddies, you were drinking? One beer lead to another, and somehow the idea of this dare came up?<BR> Jan: You know how it is.<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Yes or no<BR> Jan: Yes.<BR> (positive beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': So I can check that statement against the blood alcohol test, right? Jan: Uh... uh...<BR> 'Stupid Cop': I'm not very smart.<BR> Jan: P-pardon me?<BR> 'Stupid Cop': I'm not stupid, but nobody recruited me for my test scores if you know what I mean. You, you're smart though aren't you? I mean, really smart.<BR> Jan: I don't know<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Yes, or no.<BR> Jan: Yes<BR> (positive beep)<BR>

[[Media:Hey dad.ogg|Hey Dad]] <BR>

'Stupid Cop': Yeah I had this physics teacher. He passed me on my 12G on one condition - I had to promise him I would never take another physics class again. I guess I'm not too smart. Not like you Miss James. But you know what I am?<BR> Jan: I don't know.<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Yes, or no.<BR> Jan: No.<BR> (positive beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Good at my job.<BR> (door opens)<BR> Officer: I'm required to inform you that the door will log your ID.<BR> James J: Thanks<BR> Officer: It's the father.<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Come in.<BR> Jan: Hey dad.<BR> (warning beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Hm. There's a spike on the baseline...<BR> James J: Can I take her home?<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Uh not yet. We've got to take a statement, do some tests, standard operating procedure. The MP's only brought her here because we have a lab on site. Jan: I wasn't doing anything.<BR> James J: What kind of tests?<BR>

[[Media:Nervous.ogg|Nervous]]<BR>

'Stupid Cop': Urine test, hair sample, resonance and retina scan...<BR> James J: Do you really think that's necessary?<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Like I said, standard operating procedure.<BR> Jan: Dad, you're making the nice police officer nervous. You're making me nervous<BR> (warning beep)<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Now all of a sudden you're scared about something?<BR> Jan: No<BR> (negative beep)<BR> James J: Take your hand off the touch-plate Jan. If you're gonna give my kid a pop-quiz, I'd like to wait until I have a lawyer present.<BR> 'Stupid Cop': You might like it, but the law doesn't require it.<BR> Jan: It's no big deal dad, I can pee on a stick, it doesn't matter<BR> James J: You don't know what matters. Ok officer, sorry if I sounded upset. It's, you get a call in the middle of the night, someone tells you it's your kid<BR> 'Stupid Cop': Yeah<BR> James J: Is there a waiting room?<BR>


 * [[Media:Law abiding.ogg|Law Abiding]] → [[Media:You knew.ogg|You Knew]]

Kamal Zaman
[[Media:Parasites.ogg|Parasites]]

Hiro: Hello? Hello, are you there?<BR> Kamal: What the hell happened?<BR> Hiro: I don't know, the connection went dead for a few seconds.<BR> Kamal: I have a situation here, she's gone!<BR> Hiro: You let her escape?<BR> Kamal: It happened so fast, I didn't know what to do!<BR> Hiro: Where'd she go?<BR> Kamal: The bathroom<BR> Hiro: Copy that. What did she say when she left?<BR> Kamal: I don't know. As soon as I started talking about intestinal parasites, boom! gone!<BR> Hiro: I don't get it. That should have worked. It's right here in the book, Chapter 3 - Share Your Interests<BR>

[[Media:Eyes.ogg|Eyes]]

<BR><BR>

Kamal: Chapter 3?! You're in my earpiece here whispering date strategy to me out of a book?!<BR> Hiro: It's got references... good journals and everything.<BR> Kamal: Oh. Well that's ok I guess.<BR> Hiro: Ok, emergency action here. When she gets back, go straight to Chapter 7. Talk about her eyes<BR> Kamal: Hiro, what I know about eyes is dissecting them.<BR> Hiro: Well ok, it just says eyes here.<BR> Kamal: I was better off with the liver flukes, this is a disaster. Nothing's going--<BR> Waiter: Sir?<BR> Kamal: Hold on. Yes?<BR> Waiter: Your lady friend asked to deliver this to you, she was unavoidably called away... and, the cheque sir.<BR> Hiro: Oh man. Down in flames<BR> Kamal: Just the cheque will be fine.<BR>

[[Media:Beer.ogg|Beer]]

Hiro: Hey buddy!<BR> Kamal: Sorry about that.<BR> Hiro: Better luck next time my friend<BR>. Kamal: Beer.<BR> Hiro: I got a cold one waiting for ya, pull up a couch and start drinking.<BR> Kamal: A book, Hiroyuki?<BR> Hiro: With references! Look, it's only one date. Who knows, in a year or two...<BR> Kamal: Actually, I've got this other thing...<BR> Hiro: What?<BR> Kamal: Nothing<BR> Hiro: Oh... you have another date!<BR> Kamal: Sorta...<BR> Hiro: A... blind date.<BR> Kamal: Mostly...<BR> Hiro: Aha, an arranged date. Setup by your mother, back on coral. Word of advice -<BR> Kamal: No thanks.<BR> Hiro: Choose a cheaper restaurant. <BR>

[[Media:Four goats.ogg|Four Goats]]

<BR><BR>

Did her parents have to pay to get her set up with a handsome medical resident?<BR> Kamal: Yes. Four goats, or maybe three.<BR> Hiro: You're Joking.<BR> Kamal: Of course I'm joking, you moron.<BR> Hiro: What's her name?<BR> Kamal: Sophia, Sophia Bossedon<BR> Hiro: Someone who needs her dates arranged from 42 light years away, I'm sure she's got a great personality.<BR> Kamal: Look at the picture.<BR> Hiro: Oh man. Awe Man, you are so out of your league.<BR>

[[Media:Our hoodlums.ogg|Our Hoodlums]]

Sophia: I am so sorry. I mean, you seem like a nice guy and all.<BR> Kamal: It's ok<BR> Sophia: No, it's really not fair, and this place is so nice.<BR> Kamal: Yeah, well, I'm glad you like it.<BR> Sophia: It's just that... I can't tell my mother about Aiden. She'd freak. Aiden's, you know, very...<BR> Kamal: Earth?<BR> Sophia: He has a pony-tail... he's blonde...<BR> Kamal: He sounds great.<BR> Sophia: Yeah, he helps people get through earth immigration, you know, Visa's and whatever. He got my brother here; some of what he does is kinda grey-market, you know. I mean, really, it's black market.<BR> Kamal: But, that's not the problem.<BR> Sophia: No.<BR> Kamal: It's not so bad he's...<BR> Sophia: Colourful?<BR> Kamal: ...a hoodlum, just that he's not...<BR> Sophia: One of our hoodlums<BR> (laughing together) yeah<BR> much_lifting

Sophia:...exactly. Mom would say she understood, but...<BR> Kamal: Then you'd pay.<BR> Sophia: Ya, and the next day she'd just lie in bed, unable to face the day - not that it would be my fault<BR> Kamal: Mine does housework. Face like a closed book. Big jobs involving much lifting, doesn't need help<BR> Sophia: The whole house stops breathing.<BR> Kamal: Coral. Maybe it's just a hard place to be a mother.<BR> Sophia: I'm never going back.<BR>

meditape

Sophia: And then when Aiden did finally show up, he still had meditape on his ankle. And I felt like a total bitch.<BR> Kamal: Well how could you know? Four hours late? On your birthday...<BR> Sophia: Exactly. But there he'd been in the emergency room..<BR> Kamal: Or stopping by the pharmacy on the way back from his girlfriend's house to buy a roll of tape.<BR> Sophia: Are you trying to start trouble here?<BR> Kamal: Not at all. Tell me more about the old meditape trick.<BR> Sophia: I'm not talking to you any more.<BR> Kamal: I was dating this girl once. I got real paranoid about what she was doing, so I started... w.. well this is going to sound crazy, but I started ghosting her. You know, on the chatter net.<BR>

you_could

Sophia: You mean like, spying on her? I thought chatter lines were encrypted. No one could listen in on me, could they?<BR> Kamal: Not at all.<BR> Sophia: *gasp* You could.<BR> Kamal: Of course not.<BR> Sophia: You could, couldn't you?<BR> Kamal: Maybe a little.<BR> Sophia: Show me.<BR> Kamal: Ok. Well if some bad person couldn't live without the sound of your voice, he'd probably start by doing a reverse lookup on your chatter sig.<BR> Sophia: Is this what you always do to impress girls?<BR> Kamal: You see why my mother makes all my dates<BR> (laughs)

say_something

Kamal: Ok, well, that's good. You've got some encryption. Ok, it's not completely pathetic. Ok (beep) I'm in. Say something...<BR> Sophia: What do you mean say something? (echo) Oh my god that's my voice! That's me! What are you doing?<BR> Kamal: I'm ghosting you.<BR> Sophia: You can't do that!<BR> Kamal: You're probably right<BR> Sophia: (laughs) Oh my god. Wait... can you do that with anyone?<BR>


 * guilty

Kamal: You want me to spy on your boyfriend?<BR> Sophia: You must think I'm such a creep.<BR> Kamal: I do! Well, of course, when I did it to my girlfriend it was ok. Like the dog said - "Not me, but (together) another dog that looks just like me"<BR> (laughs) Sophia: It's just that I... I mean, there was this one time when he... you know, I mean they were drunk and it didn't mean anything, it was just body knocking<BR> Kamal: That made you feel better?<BR> Sophia: Well he promised me never, ever again. But there's... I just have this feeling...<BR> Kamal: I know.<BR> Sophia: All of a sudden he just started bringing me these gifts... Aiden can be really generous, but it just feels...<BR> Kamal: Guilty.<BR> Sophia: Yeah.<BR> Kamal: Yeah.<BR>


 * message_saved

Machine: You have 3 new messages, and 7 old messages. First unplayed message: Sophia: Kamal, thanks for the, what would you call it, the Aiden stuff. I guess I didn't realize there would be 30 hours worth. But I'll try the search-thingy you sent with it. Thanks a lot. I owe you big time!<BR> Machine: Message deleted. Next message.<BR> Sophia: Hi, Kamal. Could you call me when you get this? I managed to dump all the sleeping time, but I was wondering... oh, wait, here it is. I can search for women's voices. (giggles) That's very clever. Never mind.<BR> Machine: Message deleted. Next message.<BR> Sophia: Can you... Can you ghost someone for me, I mean, I have a name - her name is Selene Jefferson. Call me back. I'm, I'm sorry. Anyway, just call me back. I really need your help.<BR> Machine: Message saved.<BR>

tuna <BR><BR>

Sophia: I want to do something really brutal to the bastard.<BR> Kamal: I d-- I don... I mean...<BR> Sophia: Not hurt him, just- just completely humiliating him would do. In front of the girl. Where is he?<BR> Kamal: Atlanta<BR> Sophia: Atlanta? That bastard said he was gonna be in Buffalo, New York. Can I talk to him?<BR> Kamal: Not directly, he's offline.<BR> Sophia: You lost him?<BR> Kamal: No, I've still got him, I just had to be sneaky. His room is live, right, so even though his chatter's off, I'm tracking him through things like the thermostat monitors.<BR> Sophia: That's spooky.<BR> Kamal: I've got the girl. She's waiting for him in the bar. Wait... it's a restaurant. Whoa! Look at this menu! There's tuna on the menu. (whistles) Sophia: Is she pretty?<BR>

hi_aiden<BR><BR>

Kamal: No, not, not really. Like a 6, or maybe a 5.<BR> Sophia: Heh, you're a rotten liar.<BR> Kamal: Ok wait, your boyfriend just passed the electric eye at the restaurant door.<BR> Sophia: He's there? Can I talk to him?<BR> Kamal: I can let you talk to her, or him, or both of them. If you want, I could make your voice sound like it's right between them.<BR> Sophia: Do it.<BR> Kamal: Ok, you are live, any time you want.<BR> (beep) Sophia: Selene! Hi, you don't know me but Aiden does - Hi Aiden! Sorry to interrupt your business meeting in - Buffalo - I just wanted to tell you your doctor called and said if you wear loose pants and keep using the cream he gave you the sores will clear up in a couple of weeks.<BR>